Chus Martinez On Erotic Sexual Denial
Posted: October 31, 2013 Filed under: bondage, Chus Martinez, fetishism, sex | Tags: arousal, BDSM, blocked orgasm, blue balls, bondage, chastity belt, chastity device, constriction, deconstructed orgasm, denial, denied orgasm, dominant, domination, edge, ejaculation, erection, erotic feminisation, erotic humiliation, erotic sexual denial, feminisation, fetters, frustration, genital stimulation, humiliation, orgasm, orgasm control, orgasm denial, physical restraints, release, restraints, ruined orgasm, sex, sex games, sex play, sexual arousal, sexual bondage, sexual frustration, sexual practice, sexual release, submission, submissive, tease, tease and denial, tie and tease, top, total sexual denial Leave a commentErotic sexual denial, also known as orgasm denial, is a sexual practice in which a heightened state of sexual arousal is maintained for an extended length of time without orgasm, and is commonly practiced in association with BDSM and sexual bondage. Erotic sexual denial can be another name for or variant of orgasm control. Erotic sexual denial is a form of sex play.
One form of erotic sexual denial is the reduction or deprivation of all genital stimulation. To ensure a complete absence of genital stimulation, a chastity device may be used as a physical barrier to genital touch or full erection. Tease and denial describes a situation where a person’s genitalia are stimulated until he or she is close to the point at which orgasm would normally be inevitable. At that point, direct stimulation of the genitals is reduced or stopped, so as to keep the recipient on the very brink or “edge” of orgasm (as with orgasm control) but without the promise of orgasm at the end.
If orgasm still occurs after removal of stimulation, it typically brings less pleasure than usual, and is considered a “ruined orgasm”, as opposed to being a “denied orgasm” (sometimes known as “blue balls”). Alternatively (for men), the release of semen during the emission phase of ejaculation might be prevented by some sort of constriction (“blocked orgasm”). Depending on the relationship, subjects might be repeatedly teased to the point of orgasm several times, but without actual orgasm, causing feelings of intense arousal and psychological need.
To be able to control an orgasm of a partner in such sex games, physical restraints are commonly used. Situations involving bondage are typically called tie and tease and can be thought of as extended tease and denial games. This practice is often an integral part of erotic denial. Tie and tease activities are physically as well as psychologically intense, because the strong feelings of sexual frustration are escalated by the sensation of helplessness induced by bondage.
The practice of total sexual denial usually includes total avoidance of genital stimulation. This often involves the use of a physical barrier or device such as a chastity belt. Chastity belts or similar locking devices are available for both men and women. Depending on the situation, sexual arousal may still be achieved regardless of physical barriers to genital stimulation. However, this depends on the belt used.
A related practice is that of the deconstructed orgasm, in which stimulation and arousal is conducted at a very slow pace, allowing the ‘stimulator’ to obtain feedback from the ‘stimulatee’ (generally spoken, but conceivably obtained by means of body language or measuring certain bodily responses and functions). Depending upon the accuracy of the feedback, the progress towards eventual release can be judged more accurately than would be the case in an unfettered encounter, allowing the possibility of the orgasm to be delivered (whereupon observations and measurements may be continued) or of stimulation to be withdrawn or decreased in the closing stages, leading to a ruined orgasm as described below.
Where orgasm denial has been pushed to the limits, in some instances actual orgasm doesn’t materialize. This according to research accounts for a small percentage of the 70% – 80% of women that don’t reach climax during sexual intercourse. Erotic sexual denial, in various forms, is sometimes associated with creating a state of sexual need leading to a more pliable or agreeable outlook by the denied party.
Orgasm denial practices can allow dominant lovers to exercise control and training over highly intimate and psychologically significant aspects of their submissive lovers’ lives. This can extend to tolerance of increased stimulation and training both to hold back orgasm, or to orgasm on command. Dominant lovers can use this practice to experience enjoyable and sometimes intensely craved feelings of sexual control and erotic power. Submissive lovers can use this practice to help them experience enjoyable and sometimes intensely craved feelings of erotic submission, sexualised objectification and erotic loss of control.
Orgasm denial as a method of orgasm control is a widely practiced activity within BDSM erotic feminisation. The top will often deny the submissive feminised man sexual release to maintain his heightened state of sexual arousal, as a way to satisfy his desires for erotic humiliation, or as a way to satisfy the dominant’s own desires to erotically humiliate.
Chus Martinez On Orgasm Control
Posted: August 13, 2013 Filed under: Chus Martinez, sex, yoga and spirituality | Tags: altered consciousness, arousal, Bob Schwartz, climax, control, edging, erotic, erotic sexual denial, euphoria, extended massive orgasm, intensity, Leah Schwartz, manual, masturbation, multiple orgasms, One Hour Orgasm, oral, orgasm, orgasm control, peaking, physical restraints, plateau phase, pleasure, release, restraints, sex, sex toys, sexual arousal, sexual intercourse, sexual sensations, sexual stimulation, sexual technique, slow masturbation, speed, submissive, submissive partner, surfing, tease and denial, tie and tease, trigger, Venus Butterfly, wanking 3 CommentsOrgasm control, also known as “edging”, “peaking”, “surfing”, and by other terms, is a sexual technique that involves the maintenance of a high level of sexual arousal for an extended period of time without reaching orgasm, although a climax may be reached eventually. If orgasm is not reached after the extended period of arousal, it is referred to as erotic sexual denial. If the partner whose orgasm is being controlled, sometimes referred to as the submissive partner, is put into physical restraints, it may better control the orgasm (the activity is sometimes called tie and tease and if orgasm is denied it is tease and denial). Another possibility is for one partner to help produce multiple orgasms in the other.
Orgasm control can involve either one-sex partner being in control of the other partner’s orgasm, or someone delaying their own orgasm during either sexual intercourse or masturbation. To experience orgasm control, any method of sexual stimulation can be used – for example, manual, oral, intercourse, or with sex toys – either alone or by means of one or more active partners. Orgasm control is sometimes called “slow masturbation” or “extended massive orgasm”. It is similar to the Venus Butterfly technique described by Leah and Bob Schwartz in The One Hour Orgasm (1988).
In a two-person sexual activity, one partner would stimulate the other, gradually bringing them up to the point high in the plateau phase where an orgasm is actually building, and will then reduce the level of stimulation to just below that needed to trigger release. By carefully varying the intensity and speed of stimulation, and by practising with the same partner to learn their responses, a person can be held in the highly aroused state near orgasm for extended periods of time. This process may be repeated as desired, but at some point repetition may cause the urge to orgasm to become overwhelming. Once enough stimulation to achieve an orgasm is provided, the release is often stronger than usual.
Since orgasm control prolongs the experience of powerful sexual sensations occurring during the final build-up to orgasm, the physical demands of being kept or keeping oneself in this highly excited state for an extended time can induce a pleasurable, almost euphoric state, and at times creates changes within an individual’s consciousness.
Orgasm control requires a degree of skill. It also requires enough familiarity with either a partner or one’s own responses to be able to vary the intensity and the timing of the stimulation accurately. If there is too little stimulation, or if it is reduced too soon, the experience is not as intense as it could have been. If there is too much stimulation, a person may pass the point of no return and orgasm occurs too soon.
Long term intimacy between orgasm control partners helps each to understand the level of erotic intensity required by their partner. The technique is an acquired skill that is developed through practice. Performing orgasm control with the same partner(s) for extended periods of time generally leads to greater success at the practice. The technique requires all partners to be aware of the others’ limits’. Likewise, in order to control your own orgasm, you need a good knowledge of your own body and how it reacts to different levels of sexual stimulation. Orgasm control is as much about knowing your own body as it is about the sexual skills of your partner(s).
Since solo masturbation allows for precise control over sexual stimulation, many people practice orgasm control by themselves. Masturbation is an easy way to learn one’s sexual limits. Wanking practiced with the aim of orgasm control should be carried out with the intention of making every stroke feel exquisite and not to relieve tension, in the way “simple” masturbation does. This can be done through a gradual stimulation of the genitals , followed by making connections between the primary area (penis or clitoris) and secondary areas (lips, nipples or other erogenous body parts). A proper connection between genitals and other areas has been established when they are stimulated with the same moves and to the same intensity.
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